• elab posted an update 2 weeks, 3 days ago

    I have been musing this weekend about my desire to be addicted to just one. I think it requires I find someone available for personal contact at times I can trance and who also has addictive mp3s for sale. But that doesn’t seem to take into account all important factors. If they don’t know me well, they inadvertently step on areas that effectively end our relationship. This is at odds with moving me into dangerously addictive stretching that I say I want. I have not yet solve this delicate balancing act.

    • For me, I found that professional dommes are not really interested in a relationship. They are interested in a steady stream of customers that support their hobby/work. Its easy to confuse rapport in hypnosis with something else. Its a big game of illusions.

      I know what I am talking about. I invested a lot of heartblood and ran against walls many times. It took me three years to understand that.

      Deep, meaningful relationships might start online, but at some point you will find out what your play partner is interested in. In a real relationship, love and communication will bridge those steps into those areas, and personal growth for two people will occur.

      • elab replied
        2 weeks ago

        I am not really expecting something deep in the relationship realm. I could search that illusion for a very long time without success. Have you actually a domme outside the professionals? I know there was one woman on the old Inraptured who produced quite a few recordings of high quality but her goal seemed to be finding one sub and when she succeeded she pretty much disappeared.

        • Deep meaningful relationships are not an illusion. One could believe so given todays media and consumerist culture, but one would be so wrong.

          I believe every woman has a domme inside herself, some just deny themselves that part, others act it out without being aware of it. I am now intimate with a woman that is dominant in her sexuality and submissive in her emotional attachment. She knows nothing of hypnosis. Also I have a close friend who is certified and practices hypnotherapy, I will actually be assisting her a bit here and there. She has taken me under a couple of times (in person) but she doesnt want to engage in sexual play via hypnosis. Lets see maybe she will change her mind at some point. I have heard some dommes have started out that way ^^

          If you are close to Germany, you can get to know her (and me). There will be a party in June with her running the show and me being DJ ūüėČ

          Regarding the one sub thing, I myself am not a monogamous person, so I dont have a problem with a domme that has more than one sub, actually think it is normal and I had a real world relationship while playing with the online domme.

          It is actually a very funny story. I think I am quite suggestible, so once I started playing with the online domme, my feelings were intense, and then I met in real life a women who in so many ways shared traits with the domme. Same job, same age, dominant streak. Hypnosis is powerful. Entered a relationship which lasted 1,5 years. Now I think it wasnt the best idea, but I still have contact with her and in the end good came out of it for her as well as myself. Only the online domme never left her professional stance.

          So I think it is not so much a thing of being a domme or a submissive, it is a human thing. Some are skimming the surface of love, some want to dive deep into it. In the tantric tradition, the energy center of the heart is located above the energy center of willpower (solar plexus). Love trumps power play, it should be like that.

          Behind every domme and submissive lies a human being with his or her emotional history. From my own history, I can see and understand some of my actions and motivations. To explore this history together with a partner from the other sex can be very fulfilling and actually realize personal growth. This is what I mean with deep relationship, and I feel it is the most valuable thing to come out of this relations. Physical and emotional pleasure is cheap.

          • I thought about what I wrote a few days ago and it sounded a bit harsh in part. Please take it with a grain of salt. I am grateful for the experiemces i had even with the professional domme.

            • Opinionated perhaps but not harsh. I appreciated your point of view. I wish Germany were closer for me but that visit will not be possible at this time.